Have you ever felt yourself losing your own will? Have you ever felt drained of even the most fundamental desires to do basic things. I have. I cannot speak. I haven’t been able to open my mouth since my imprisonment. It’s like my mouth is zipped shut.
You wouldn’t believe me if I told you, or if I could tell you, but I used to be a wonderful singer. It was said of me that I could make anyone’s day just a little bit brighter just by the sound of my voice. I found my first love through my song. I wonder where she is now.
The only time I can even separate my lips is when I have to eat. I don’t know why. It’s as if the mental barrier that makes me unable to open my mouth has a key made of food. Even though my mouth opens though, I still can’t speak, let alone, sing.
Singing was when I felt the most free. Ironically, it’s what got me imprisoned. My captors heard me singing in the woods, and the next thing I knew, I was behind bars. Don’t ask me why they wanted to capture me. I never caused any trouble. All I did was sing and taught my children to do the same. Maybe they didn’t like my high notes.
After the loss of my voice, the worse part was the way people stared. For some reason, people liked to visit my prison. Before my confinement, I had a general rule. I only wanted to be heard, not seen. In prison, however, I was only seen and not heard. Even if I had a functioning voice, I doubted people would notice. It’s always so loud in here, one more voice wouldn’t be observed.
I am quite old now. I have not only lost my will to sing, but also to live. I long ago gave up hope that I would see my family again. I recently gave up hope that I would see outside this prison again, and now I’ve given up hope of seeing another sunrise.
I just wanted to sleep. Maybe in my dreams afterwards I could see my family. Maybe it was in my final rest that I would once again let my voice flow pleasantly into the wind and into the ears of others.
My head started to feel light, and I could feel my balance decreasing. I swayed back and forth for a moment, and then I felt something I hadn’t felt in a long time… peace. I was ready to go. I just needed to do one more thing.
I opened my mouth, and let out one long note. My voice was just as beautiful as it had been years before. For the first time since morning, the prison went quiet. Everyone stared at me. I stared back for a moment, and then I collapsed.
I fell all the way from my perch and onto the hard floor of my cage. I noticed my wing broke from the fall, but it didn’t hurt. I knew that I was going to fly forever from that moment forward, along with my mate and my chicks.